Unpleasant surprises

Really. I am an unsuccessful blogger. As I cruise through past posts the pattern gets all to obvious. Once every six months? *slapping my hand* *bad blogger... Bad blogger!*

Oh well. It's mine and that's what happens.

Our little family has been through hell since the last post. My hubby and I each lost a sister, almost a month apart in fact. Both were fine, then both weren't. No drama, just gone. It still takes my breath away.

We lost Connie first. It was on the heels of the best weekend we had spent with friends in years. In fact, our friends live where there is zero cell service. We had no idea until we got back "on the grid" so to speak. Then the phone messages started. And continued. And killed a little place that you hold sacred in your space. You know the one I am talking about... the big sister pedestal. Husband is a middle child and I am a first born, so this was not something we had prepared for. She was his mom-figure and the only big sister I will ever get.

Note to self. life doesn't give a shit if you are prepared or not.

My sister and I were not close. We had a rocky relationship in the past few years. Rocky? Wrong word. Boulder-y would be a better description. But missing her is as real as it gets. I found her number in my phone the other day and it reduced me to mush on the couch for the entire day. Try as I might I just could not get it together. Her birthday was just as bad. I had planned to spend the day with my daughter and granddaughter ... just hanging out... you know the drill. When I realized it was Jane's birthday it was all over. I couldn't even get dressed. Then I got pissed because I couldn't get dressed. Then I got really pissed because it snuck up on me like a thief in the night.

Typical of our relationship though. I hope eventually I will get over being surprised at the mountain of misery this has presented me. Not that I am in a hurry, but ... I'm just sayin'.