Camelot - redefined.

The Republicans are in trouble. GW, after last night, may just be yet another closed chapter in American history. I say these things with all sincerity, waving my voter registration card in the air, feeling the need to march to the courthouse and change my party affiliation from Republican to Democrat. (Sorry mom)

As I watched Bill Clinton rivot the delegates (and myself) during his speech, I wondered out loud to Steven, a died-in-the-wool democrat himself, where the hell did this come from? I don't remember the polish and confidence exhibited during an electrifying address at the Democratic Nation Convention. I do remember a feeling of 'he's pulling a fast one here', but it is really difficult to discern the liberal or conservative media from a deeply Republican area. Last night, Clinton wiped that slate clean. He was charming. He was engaging. He demonstrated a sense of humor, all without side-stepping his personal background of sometimes questionable issues. His honestly regarding his status in the monetary social order was refreshing. I laughed out loud at his remarks about tax cuts for the top 1% of the nation. It is after all true, but to have it slammed in your face when everyone I know is having a hell of a time paying their monthly bills makes my blood boil. Good job Bill. It worked.

And let's not forget Hillary. My god, can we say "Camelot"?? She was always a favorite figure in the heirarchy, and her strength of character radiated through last night as she stumped for better controls against terrorism, and healthcare for everyone.

I can't say the Clintons were perfect. My son Jacob has a lucrative job as a firefighter due to the Clinton policy of closing the forests to responsible environmental management. Pine Bark Beetle has decimated the western forests, thus the fire rages on. Bill commented on China and Japan being "our bankers". Well of course they are, isn't that the action he expected when he courted the Chinese government not so many years ago? I am not sure it is going to matter at this point. Too many crave the prosperity available to the average Joe not so many years ago.

GW, what have you done? The nation followed you willingly into the "glory days" of your administration, cheered you on as you struck with force and determination, and stood solidly in your camp as the war on terrorism raged on. Now, the political platform for the challenging party looks amazingly inviting. I can't imagine I feel any different than a million other Republicans. We all want to kick some terrorist ass. But can't we prosper as a whole in the mean time? Can only the ultra rich get richer as the rest of us slide into the financial muck?

Tonight will be fascinating, to say the least. I look forward to the bluntness of Teresa Heinz Kerry. Who doesn't love the fact she can tell a reporter to shove it and still come out smelling like a rose?

The house is a-rockin' in Boston. I won't bother knockin'. I'm just goin' on in......

You know it's hot when.....

Remember when you were 15 and the stiffling heat of summer didn't even phase you? Boy, I do. I remember sunbathing on top of mom and dad's motorhome in the driveway with my best friend. I must have looked like an over-roasted marshmellow, but the heat didn't make me think twice. I was driving in my car yesterday and a few "you know when's" came to me. Some of them actually happened, making it all the more absurd.

You know it's hot when......
.......you walk across the post office parking lot and your flip flops stick. (true story, thought my flippies were lost forever)
.......you get in the hot tub to cool off and it works. (again, true story)
.......the cat gives you a *kiss my furry ass* look as you are forcing him out the door, when he normally bolts for the great outdoors everytime he sees a break. (yep, true)
.......you get up at 6 a.m. and the current temp is 80 with 45-50% humidity. (last three days)
.......you have absolutely nothing to blog about because you have stayed in your cave to beat the heat for days on end. (at least you don't have to shave your legs for it)
.......you get a tan in the shade.

On a brighter note, it is supposed to storm like hell tonight. Three inches of rain on the way. Oh crap, I gotta leave my cave and get that yard mowed.

It Pays To Bitch!

Yes, YES, it pays to bitch! Gramma told me, and so did mom, if you can't say something nice, then don't say anything at all. Honest to God I wasn't mean... I promise. But let me tell ya sista!! Halleluiah it paid off in spades today to dig in my heels and bitch. Here's how it went down.
 
We got this hokey phone call last April about "getting a free vacation, just for attending a presentation".   Yeah, I know.   Time share nightmare.    But Steve and I figured what the hey, and went down to Overland Park anyway.  It was exactly as we imagined, but we got a certificate for three days and two night at a resort, and additionally a Bahama's cruise vacation, good for three years. Not bad, eh?  I will listen to a whole lot of crap for a paid vacation.  Off we go on our merry way, certificates in hand, all warm and fuzzy deciding when to explore the world.
 
So this morning I get out my certificate for the resort.  We are getting married September 5 (happy birthday Dad) and I figured what a great way to use up this first "free" vacation.  I tried in vain for 30 minutes to complete the deal through their website, and got that nasty little message 'Please contact customer service at bla bla bla bla'. Dammit I hate squeezing into my bitch shoes before lunch.
 
"Oh, the lady you need to speak with comes in at four."  Who the hell goes to work at four in the afternoon?
 
I phoned her. I gave her my best assertive voice, and she didn't even wiggle. It was like they had been through this many many times.  "No problem, I will send you a new group of certificates, and how would you like to have roundtrip airfare and hotels to Jamaica, Las Vegas, or Cabo San Lucas?" 
 
Lake of the Ozarks? not me... I am going tropical for this honeymoon...
 
That isn't even the best one.  I will write about the work crisis another time, though, because the solution is still being fleshed out.  Although....  I am hearing the distant sound of "cha-ching" in my future.....
 
 

I give

Ok. I admit it. I am (oh man, I am about to think this out loud)... I am middle aged. There. I got it out. After planning, re-planning, and finally conceding, our wedding is officially a train wreck. It started out on July 4th. It got moved to July 25th. It more than likely has degenerated from a wedding to a justice of the peace formality. I wanted the specific day I dedicate my life to the man I love to be a bit more ceremonial than getting a drivers license. It looks like I had my one chance at a romantic wedding, and it didn't work out too well either.

I see awesome weddings all the time. My former editor at the paper had a wonderful wedding, in spite of the wind. How do they do it? Youth and enthusiasm, that's how. Both a couple of commodities I lost a few years back. I can't stomp and scream it's not fair. Not that I don't want to... but that would not be fair either. I really think it has more to do with being young, bull headed, and never willing to concede. Unfortunately for the princess in me, I have learned the "concession lesson" quite well. Maybe too well.

Ok! I give. To whom ever is yanking my spiritual chain, YOU WIN! It wasn't a big thing to ask. Just a little romance. Just a little spark of non-reality. Man I really sound depressed about it all, but really I'm not. It must have more to do with coming to grips with age over enthusiasm, because I know honestly a 30 minute window of romance is nothing to build the rest of your life upon. Been there, done that, wouldn't recommend the movie.

On a brighter note, I found out my potential new employer called my former employer yesterday. *J*, I hope you had good things to say about me. After all, it is your fault I discovered a love of the publishing industry.

Gotta go check the fences, did you do something nice for someone yesterday?

Monday, Monday

The interview in Lenexa went well... at least I feel it did. But I have had that feeling before. You know the one... you feel like you cinch the interview and the phone call never comes. I met four very nice people in a relaxed enviroment, spent a half hour with each selling myself (something not easy for me) and left with a decent feeling about it all. Now comes the incessent tapping of the fingernail on the table as I wait impatiently for the phone to ring. Oh well, time will tell.

Sarah called me this afternoon. We spent a couple of hours on the phone. Life has been tough on that little girl, but she is coming out ok in spite of it all. I suppose the angel in charge of assigning certain spirits to certain families really did know what he was doing. Sarah, you are my inspiration. I know so many 40 year olds wishing they had their personal pile heaped as neatly as you. Keep on striving, my friend.

It's hot. Weatherbug says 95. That's even to hot to go sit in the hottub. Wish I could help myself to the neighbor's pool. I don't think it will happen. He's got good fences too.

Summertime blues

Music in suburbia is a tough row to hoe. Steve's band played last night in Lee's Summit to a crowd that was both appreciative and inattentive at the same time. The band had a few magic moments, but the best part was watching a group of guys smile through the entire night. Even when there was only four people left enjoying the show. It is a strange thing to see people wander out of a performance like nothing matters to the artists on stage. I know they are paid to be there, but there is an honor in art being lost to the instant gratification of current society.

I suppose truthfully this is what allows me to keep my manuscripts private. I know the effort and soul poured into any given piece of art. Living in the "artist realm" with a musician has shown me a new side to the concept of sharing your craft. It just takes a lot of guts to give it up. Seems to me whatever your chosen form of art, big cahunas are required to allow the uninitiated and/or the uninformed to view that portion of your soul. Mostly it seems, artists of any venue are gentle and appreciative when that door is opened... it those others... the ones we try to mass market to who can slaughter you the easiest. Why is that?

I am sure I do not know. I may not ever know. I stand with pride telling myself it never matters what others really think about me. Is that true? I am beginning to wonder.

Job interview tomorrow with the rest of the exec team. Cross my fingers and hope for the best.

Is there any respect left?

July 8

I had a job interview yesterday in Lenexa. It was a wonderful experience, as far as interviews go, and truly I am perfect for the position. I left the company feeling like it was a great environment, creative, expressive, free-flowing as you can get within a corporate structure. Today I will make that all important followup phone call to keep my name in the front of her memory and hopefully it will pay off. I would make a fantastic Executive Assistant. Next week I will be meeting with the rest of the exec team to see if our personalities blend. I have great hopes for this position. But, I am getting away from my chosen topic.

So I left the building after sharing lunch with a friend I have known since I was 10. Barb is awesome, talented, and totally under-utilized in her capacity, but she is a trooper, and keeping her chin up. I felt on top of the world as I stopped at the Quik Trip to fill my car with gas.

Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed a man watching me. As I looked in his direction, he approached me and asked me what type of perfume I wore. Hesitantly I told him it was a scent from Alfred Sung and why did he want to know? He said he was a representative from a major perfume manufacturer and would I come to his car and sample his fragrances. Huge red flag.

Now, keep in mind it was 1:30 in the afternoon. I was in a busy gas station. I was dressed in my best suit and he was dressed casual business. Clean cut. Beady eyes. My intuition was bonging away to get the hell out of there. I have no idea what he really wanted. It completely freaked me out. Who approaches a woman, alone, at a gas station about perfume? I hastily told him I was late for an appointment and hurried my butt into the store.

The guy at the counter thought I had lost my mind. I bought a soda and just stood at the door watching him. He didn't approach anyone else. After a couple of minutes, he got in his car and left with two other women. They were not dressed for business, casual or otherwise. They seemed like they all knew each other. I was not about to leave that store as long as he was in the parking lot. The major thought which kept running in my head was the time when I was very small and a stranger tried to get me into his car as I was walking home from the store. It was a block from my house. I was probably 8. I didn't grow up in the city. I grew up in a tiny town where everyone knew everyone else's business, and most front doors didn't have locks that worked. Thankfully nothing happened to me or anyone else at that time. I ran home, told my mom, and went about being a little kid.

On the news this morning, they told of a woman that was raped last night. It was in the same area (generally) where I was yesterday. My god I feel horrible for her. Was it the same disgusting human? Yes, my cage is rattled.

So where is the respect? Has all of humanity lost the connection we are naturally born with? Why is it ok to be horrible? Were these people raised by dingos? All this crap in the world goes on and on and what is going to make it stop? We are fighting a war in Iraq. It is tribal in nature, has been raging for a couple thousand years, and the great American government machine goes in to rescue what? Oil? We can't solve a tribal war.

We can solve a country spinning off its axis. We can step up to the plate and say that's enough. We can make a difference by just being respectful and decent to each other. Instead of turning our backs on each other to preserve precious boundaries, just reach out once in a while and do something kind. I know it can make a difference. I have to believe it will. I have five children preparing to live in this hell hole of a world. They will impact thousands of lives just by being who they are. They are good people with good values.

It's time for all of us to make a conscious effort to make a difference. Just one act of decency or kindness will ripple out to people you don't even know. It could sway someone from doing a bad thing to someone else. It most likely will inspire someone else to pass it along. As evil travels from one being to another, so does good.

I have to go do something kind for a stranger, right after I check my fences.