It Pays To Bitch!

Yes, YES, it pays to bitch! Gramma told me, and so did mom, if you can't say something nice, then don't say anything at all. Honest to God I wasn't mean... I promise. But let me tell ya sista!! Halleluiah it paid off in spades today to dig in my heels and bitch. Here's how it went down.
 
We got this hokey phone call last April about "getting a free vacation, just for attending a presentation".   Yeah, I know.   Time share nightmare.    But Steve and I figured what the hey, and went down to Overland Park anyway.  It was exactly as we imagined, but we got a certificate for three days and two night at a resort, and additionally a Bahama's cruise vacation, good for three years. Not bad, eh?  I will listen to a whole lot of crap for a paid vacation.  Off we go on our merry way, certificates in hand, all warm and fuzzy deciding when to explore the world.
 
So this morning I get out my certificate for the resort.  We are getting married September 5 (happy birthday Dad) and I figured what a great way to use up this first "free" vacation.  I tried in vain for 30 minutes to complete the deal through their website, and got that nasty little message 'Please contact customer service at bla bla bla bla'. Dammit I hate squeezing into my bitch shoes before lunch.
 
"Oh, the lady you need to speak with comes in at four."  Who the hell goes to work at four in the afternoon?
 
I phoned her. I gave her my best assertive voice, and she didn't even wiggle. It was like they had been through this many many times.  "No problem, I will send you a new group of certificates, and how would you like to have roundtrip airfare and hotels to Jamaica, Las Vegas, or Cabo San Lucas?" 
 
Lake of the Ozarks? not me... I am going tropical for this honeymoon...
 
That isn't even the best one.  I will write about the work crisis another time, though, because the solution is still being fleshed out.  Although....  I am hearing the distant sound of "cha-ching" in my future.....